I know I write this letter after a long time,nearly five months
after my last one. It is not that I dont want to write You one,
but it is the foresight of your rejection that held my emotion
back all these days. But this time I have to do it,not for
the sake of my pent up feelings but for the sake of
your own existence.
Only few things have transpired in this lapse of few months.
Firstly I have slowly learned to mature myself in the spate of
successive failures. Though everyday dusks with a sense of
loneliness and depression, a sense of courage and faith dawns
on me the next morning. Secondly I am running after the
following statement to understand what it reads,
'Furious activity is no substitute for understanding',
but often forget not to run furiously.
And then as always your thoughts scrabble for a hold in
my mind, the old memories haunt me like a deep crying
sound in the mid night. I try to overcome it in vain,
not knowing that it has become the base plank of my little
wooden house. The whole process is like a fish bone stuck
in the throat, neither I can swallow it nor I can spit it out.
What would a beautiful flower do if the only woman in
the world denied it? What would a little baby do if
her mother refused to kiss it? what would I do
if you didnt embrace me?
I feel like I am denied a drop of water when a potful futilely
leaks to the ground through its crack. It looks like a jumble
which I cannot play well. Altogether My life has become like
a game where I am not given authority to take decision but
only allowed to ride on fate. The word 'fate' seems to be
the father of God 'Proteus' trying many shapes to take
You away from me. But I keep your thoughts intact to
continue the flame of desire to kiss You,my lovely Muse.
Yes I am ready to swim against the tide all along the sea
to see You in your own island with a smile.